What if years went by like seasons of a show?
Like your first birthday is like “season one: pilot”
TINY KITTEN WITH A TINY KITTEN BACKPACK
What could POSSIBLY be in the TINY BACKPACK?!
cat nip dime bag and a list of people to kill
nothing will fuck you up as much as the realization that there’s no real reason the alphabet needs to be in order
I HATE THIS TEXT POSTI read this to my boyfriend and he’s been like this for the last five minutes…
The saddest thing is that most people will find this humorous instead of serious. We’re standing right beside one another, and yet we text others instead of actually speaking to each other. Have you ever sat down and thought about how uncomfortable we now are around one another that it’s so bad that we literally pretend to be texting someone when we’re not, just so it’s less awkward to stand beside people? What’s supposed to strengthen our bonds has taken away from it. It’s time to take our faces out of our phones and notice the world, give a kind gesture to someone, and go SEE your friends instead of just texting them.
I’m going to let that sink in.
Ah yes let me just up and leave school right in between my classes so I can go see the friend 40 miles away that i’m currently texting instead of making idle chit chat with the people around me that I don’t particularly care for.
Fuck your pretentious shit.
"whines evil technology is making people antisocial its not real communication if its not face to face and im a pretentious self righteous shitbaby that asks random people on the street for the time and feels good about it"
How to tell if it was a gunshot or fireworks: gunshots don’t echo, fireworks do.
thaNK YOU SO MUCH
the fact that anyone might commonly need to know this terrifies me
clearly you’re not from america
honestly my dad is such a freak he never says goodnight like a normal person he just says “i’ll be back” and he goes upstairs and when you ask where he is or go looking for him hes asleep and the next morning when you see him he just says “good morning im back’ like what is wrong with him
Spongebob is the mother fuckin devil
rock fan: rap sucks, they don’t talk about anything that matters
the beatles: I am the eggman, they are the eggmen, I am the walrus, goo goo goo joob
a very intimidating middle class family is staring me down in panera bread because i put mac and cheese on my baguette
update: i told them that staring is rude and that i would eat anything on this baguette including their small child
you are everything i aspire to be